LUKY:
WHEN RETREAT FATHERS preached a mission in my hometown, we were all filled with joy and love for each other.
Any time you'd bump into a fellow parishioner you'd beam at each other breathlessly and make foolish comments like:
"Didn't they give us blazes last night?"
"Yes! Aren't they wonderful?"
When the priests had left we all tried to turn over a new leaf, and for a while I wasn't allowed to gossip at home. If I did, my husband would quell me with a stern glance and say: "We must be careful not to hurt one another!"
My own work
Thoroughly chastened I sat down and composed my own quiz, entitled: "Do you hurt people?"
And as there is no law against playing a game during a coffee-break, I invite you to answer it here and now in order to see how you score.
Now for the quiz:
A
Your friend is complaining about the current cost of living. You know that your friend has a higher income coming into the family than yours. Do you say:
1. Everyone is complaining about it
2. Oh, I think salaries are correspondingly good
3. Gosh, whatever do you do with your money?
B
You are at a wedding when the groom blushingly gets up to make his speech. Do you:
1. Listen attentively to his words, making sure you're wearing a benevolent expression
2. Make use of the lull to fill up your plate
3. Chant "Why oh why should we believe you." At every breath he takes
C
You meet a friend who has picked up weight. Do you say:
1. My, but you look well
2. Lovely to see you again
3. You've picked up weight, haven't you?
D
A friend proudly shows you a coat just finished. You think it looks homemade. Do you say:
1. Have you ever thought of taking lessons?
2. Can you still undo that bit in front?
3. My, you have been busy. The coat is a tribute to you
E
You walk into a friend's house and find it very untidy. Do you say:
1. Sorry I didn't let you know I was coming. Pass me a dishcloth?
2. Not finished yet? My place was spick and span by eight
3. Why don't you hire help?
F
Your friend is looking off colour and starts running down his/her spouse. Do you say:
1. Give us all the news. Don't hold anything back!
2. I never could see what you saw in him/her
2. Stop moaning, we all know you adore him/her
G
You visit a friend whose children are being children. Do you say:
1. Never mind the kids. Mine are the same
2. Children, why don't you listen to your father/mother
3. I'm glad I can control MY kids
H
You are at a party when someone makes an inappropriate remark. Seated beside him/her is his/her spouse, and they are visibly mortified. Do you:
1. Turn, grin at him/her and answer in kind
2. Smile uncomprehendingly and walk on
3. Make a pointed remark and watch the spouse squirm
I
Your spouse has got an increase. Do you say:
1. Congratulations, I'm so proud of you
2. Hurrah! At last I'll be able to get some new clothe.
3. Just remember it's mine, e.
J
Your child is appearing in a school play and wants to sell you a ticket. Do you:
1. Buy two, one for your spouse, in the hope you can get a babysitter
2. Take one, intending to have an excuse on the night
3. Say: "Tell our teacher I can't afford either the money or the time"
YOUR RATING
Three marks for each of the following; A1, B1, C2, D3, E1, F3, G1, H2, I1, J1.
THE VERDICT
27-30: You are a tactful, pleasant person to know and will not hurt anyone deliberately. Your friends can turn to you in times of trouble. Congratulations
20-26: You are basically kind but have an uncomfortable knack of hurting people in your honesty. Might it be a good thing to sacrifice brutal frankness for charity more often?
1-19: You should watch your words more carefully, remembering that words can cause actual pain
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