Luky;
I consider attitude to be the most important step on the road to success. The Oxford dictionary defines success as "favourable outcome, accomplishment of what was aimed at, attainment of wealth or fame or position..."
To me, success does not mean attainment of wealth or fame or position. Some of the unhappiest, most insecure people I knew possessed wealth, fame and position. But it does mean favourable outcome, accomplishment of what was aimed at, but within the limits imposed by the circumstances.
To achieve success in life
To achieve success in life, one has to school one's attitude. One should decide on priorities, and then go for them like a greyhound. I knew a woman, mother of a large family, whose eldest son had gone to university.
For years she had quietly prepared for the event. Neither her husband or herself earned large wages, but nothing was stopping her eldest child's achievement.
She bought nothing for herself, turned every penny several times before spending it, and then one January he actually went to university. Once he was put on the road, he managed to get jobs to help him pay for his books, and no doubt he had a loan. One day, seeing her looking so bravely shabby, I couldn't help saying:
"It must be hard on you financially sending your child to varsity."
She smiled, a very joyful smile.
"Oh, I wouldn't say that", she replied casually. "In life I have found when you really want to do something and you go all out for it, you'll attain it in the end."
It's that attitude of hers which will in the end lift her son from his poor environment and achieve an easier, more comfortable way of life than his parents ever knew. As for his mother, once she has him safely launched, she will, I'm sure, start saving and sacrificing so that her other children can follow suit. She had her priorities sorted out, and went after success like a greyhound, never mind what it may have cost her.
The educational needs of my children
Like my friend, I too made the educational needs of my children my priority. I got up, even on holidays, at the crack of dawn to take my eldest child to her hospital where she eventually wrote her finals one March.
My eldest son now holds a Master's Degree, and he did it all on his own.
Another of my sons sustained brain injury with resultant damage at birth. There was a child psychologist who was forever telling me to put him into a home, so that his brothers and sisters wouldn't be embarassed about him in front of their friends.
"If his brothers and sisters are embarrassed, they can go", we decided.
"It's his home, too."
Our attitudes sustained us through the difficulties in raising a child with the challenge of brain injury. He went to the Sisters in Umzumbe for two years and they prepared him beautifully for his first confession and holy Communion. Eventually he came home to us.
And if his brothers and sisters were embarrassed about him, they have always had the dignity to hide it from their parents. Rather than humiliate them, the fact of their having a mentally challenged brother has increased their respect for all God's creatures in their hearts.
We are the captains of our own ships
It is our attitude to life which is infinitely more important than the things that happen to us. We are the captains of our own ships.
We should never whine: "I can't stand any more of this."
We can stand it all right, if only we make up our minds to stand it.
Jesus of Nazareth and Mary of Nazareth have many graces available, which they're ever ready to shower upon us. All we have to do is to ask them for these graces and they will be poured upon us in abundance.
Catherine Nicolette;
My beloved brother with the brain injury completed his studies at a special medium school.
I am immensely proud of his abilities and talents; we are truly the best of friends.
My brother is exceptionally gifted in peacemaking between people at outs with each other.
He has intuitive counselling skills, and a peaceful and loving spirit that has healed many rifts and broken hearts. He also has wonderful ability with friendship.
It is he who advised me to start photography, as I would discover I had a gift for it.
Upon his advice I started taking photographs, and to my amazement found I absolutely loved it.
My brother has great ability in making wonderful works of art with his hands, spending hours of patient labour over tapestries and linen for sale. He will not be rushed; money is not the object. He only wants enough for his needs. What he does want is that any item he makes is made with love, is of the best quality and will last for years, useful and beautiful in other people's houses.
I believe that as injury at birth damaged some of my brother's inherent intellectual power, God gave him powerful spiritual gifts that have sustained all of us at some time or another.
I well remember Dad and Mom calling us together when the psychologist was advising my brother be put into a home.
I remember well being appalled at the very thought that we could ever be embarrassed by our beloved brother.
Who could ever be embarrassed by being related to a King among men?
*Photograph taken by Catherine Nicolette in springtime Ireland. Please feel free to use photograph copyright free for any worthy purpose
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